This why I’m still single, I don’t find this list of demands Einstein made to Mileva, his wife of 11 years, outrageous at all when plenty of others have already slit their throats in rage. See for yourself:

1. You will make sure:
1. that my clothes and laundry are kept in good order;
2. that I will receive my three meals regularly in my room;
3. that my bedroom and study are kept neat, and especially that my desk is left for my use only.
2. You will renounce all personal relations with me insofar as they are not completely necessary for social reasons. Specifically, You will forego:
1. my sitting at home with you;
2. my going out or travelling with you.
3. You will obey the following points in your relations with me:
1. you will not expect any intimacy from me, nor will you reproach me in any way;
2. you will stop talking to me if I request it;
3. you will leave my bedroom or study immediately without protest if I request it.
4. You will undertake not to belittle me in front of our children, either through words or behavior.

So basically the list can be summed up as “keep my things clean, don’t disturb me and don’t belittle me”. Seems perfectly fine to me, but a lot of people out there are calling Einstein a demon as horrific as Hitler. I don’t get that.

What happened after “the list”? Mileva and Einstein divorced 5 years later and Einstein went on to marry his cousin Elsa Einstein and lived happily for 17 years until her death in 1936 from heart and kidney complications at age 60.

No idea if he had a list for her too, but going by this…

Elsa spent most of her marriage with Albert acting as gatekeeper, protecting him from unwelcome visitors and charlatans.

… seems like she didn’t need a list to take care of her talented “Albertle”. Their wavelengths already matched making a list of demands unnecessary, I think. What happened to Mileva? The poor woman died from depression, right? Not really. She lived ostentatiously with three large houses she bought from the alimony she got from Einstein.

Einstein’s tastes here seem to match my own; I prefer to marry a motherly figure  like Elsa who’ll take care of me and provide me a quiet life focused around my work, than an uppity “little girl in a grown woman’s body” like Mileva who wants showers of attention and social life and dance parties and lipsticks and hats and frocks and laces and shoes with heels and tattoos and servants and butlers and houses and jewels and cars and the right to belittle me in front of friends and family and all of the rest of that jazz.

See, like Einstein I like to be maintained, not maintain. Unfortunately for me, that’s about the only similarity I share with the timeless genius so my fate is a foregone conclusion.